GRAVESEND’S CASE STATED.
The papers say that a deputation from Gravesend has waited upon the Government, and demanded that in the new Reform Bill provision should be made for giving a member of Parliament to that odoriferous borough. The Government rather snubbed the deputation, which reception Mr. Punch thinks was rude, and he has therefore resolved to aid the oppressed, and assert the claims of Gravesend to a share in the representation. He has requested the Mayor and Corporation to give him a list of the reasons why Gravesend considers it should have a member in the people’s House, and he has pleasure in publishing the grounds on which the demand is based. They are these:
1st. Because the aristocratic element predominates far too largely in Gravesend, it having no fewer than three Piers.
2nd. Because half its population lets apartments, and would therefore expect its members to spare no panes in setting a Bill in a proper light.
3rd. Because the other half of its population boils shrimps, and is therefore not likely to be deceived be political Feelers.
4th. Because it is quite opposite Tilbury Fort, and therefore likely to resist profligate military expenditure.
5th. Because it is celebrated for its water-cresses, and is therefore likely to enforce official reform in the way of Small Salary.
6th. Because its lodging-letters rob their lodgers’ brandy bottles, and therefore must understand the spirit of the age.
7th. Because, being burned down about once a year, there is no kind of Policy with which it is not familiar.
8th. Because there is a popular demand for a Digest of laws, and a person accustomed to Gravesend cookery can digest anything.
9th. Because it is next Milton, and therefore as good as Shakespeare, who is always being represented.
10th. Because genteel people now go on to Margate, and compensation to Gravesend, in the way of election expenditure, would be highly acceptable,
11th. Because it is aggravating to see so many returning officers going over to Tilbury, and not to have one Returning Officer for Gravesend.
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